Online Dating Site Bitterness

I don't know how many of you already know this, but JMD and Jen set up a profile for me on the online dating site greatboyfriends.com, which is based on a rather clever idea:

Who doesn’t know a great guy (or girl) who is shockingly, still single? Maybe it’s your best friend, your not-for-me ex, your adorable brother -- you get it. Post them here and “set them up” with an equally cool, preapproved date; i.e., no one makes it onto our A list unless a true friend like you signs ’em up.

(If you're curious, try searching for 'Canadabat')

I thought it was very kind of them to put up a post for me. Of course, I have done nothing with this site, nor has anything come up. But I did get one of the site's promotional emails today:

Weddings: A Great Place to Find Love

We bet you have one more wedding to attend this summer for a best friend, sibling, cousin, coworker, or even an ex. Don't dread it -- weddings are beautiful events where two things are guaranteed: 1) some of the guests will be unknown to you; and 2) some of those unknown guests will be single (and cute!). So get primed to party, and put plenty of thought into the impression you make.

This sent waves of bitterness coursing through my body. I guess the thing that set me off is the perky optimism of this message. I did some counting, and I believe that I have been to 31 weddings (at least) as an adult, including seven as a member of the wedding party. This, of course, increases my pathos on their scale--I don't remember having one encounter at any of these weddings that made me think, "Yeah, this could possibly go somewhere; I should try to get her contact info."

Then again, that's not terribly different from most social events I go to. Of course, it is mostly a manifestation of my general social awkwardness, especially around new people. I know one couple that met at a wedding (U5 and Rebecca), and know about at least one or two other hook-ups; I'm not trying to dismiss the concept here.

More importantly, the major problem is that I usually see weddings as events to reconnect with old friends, rather than to meet new ones. As a result, my interactions all end up relatively inwards-looking and 'closed-circle' based. Alternately, there is protection by staying within the herd, and I'm sure the hunters can find more juicy targets than me (although, however, I do fall into the 'old and slow' category, which is usually the favorite of predators).